As a balding man I often get jealous of those with hair.
You get to style it, complain about rain ruining it and, most of all, you get to visit the hairdresser’s and have them ask you if you’ve been on holiday this year.
Thankfully that won’t happen for any of us.
They won’t want their attempt at small-talk to trigger a rant about the chaos at the port of Dover.
Huge queues have happened as people tried to cross to France.
Some people were waiting for 15 hours to be allowed onto the continent.
For years people have predicted that, in the future, more of us would spend out holidays in the UK.
It seems those predictions were right.
The problem was caused by extended processing times at the French border controls.
When we were a member of the European Union you barely had to wave your ID before you were let through.
Now that we are a third party nation more detailed checks are required.
But we’re not allowed to blame these queues on Brexit.
Home Secretary Suella Braverman has said it is not “fair” to blame the hours-long delays at Dover port on Brexit.
We wouldn’t want to be unfair, that would seem like bullying and they have people in the Government to do that for us.
In the future this situation could get worse with plans to not only check our passports but also take biometric data from every Brit trying to get into France.
I don’t know what biometric data will be needed but I know the word means to measure things about your body.
Imagine the delay while I carefully unload my pockets to make me seem less fat.
One of the reasons given to explain why the French authorities were overwhelmed was an unexpected number of coaches.
I would have thought most coach trips are planned so it should be easy to know how many to expect.
Were people just taking their coach out for a drive in Kent and thought, “While we’re here let’s go and get some duty free.”
Joking aside, I have sympathy for anyone caught up in this.
No one wants to spend over half a day on a coach and at the end of that suffering you still haven’t travelled anyway.
It’s the same reason I don’t use treadmills in the gym.
At this rate the only way to get across the Channel is to try to get a lift back with the people smugglers.
Remember, it’s not about the destination, it’s about the journey, which is fortunate as that’s going to take ages.
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